The Price of Personal Growth

Self doubt and doubting what we’re learning, is fairly normal in anything that will shape or change how we see the world and relate to it. The main thing to remember is that we are completely reshaping our thinking. The new paradigms may seem strange and so we may "feel" the need to stop and investigate or abandon it, rather than flowing with it.

When added to the heightened awareness that is developed over time, it also means being more aware of paradigm shift. More aware of what  may or may not have been achieved, more aware that of goal and currently can't see how it can happen. Maybe even the next step can't see the next step.

At that point stop and ask yourself, have I made "any" progress towards the A1 goal.

If that was to be  answered in conventional, measurable terms I would have to say no.

However if I measure my capacity to accept the reality of that goal/dream, based on the aforementioned awareness and paradigm shifts then I have made phenomenal progress.

An A1 goal means being prepared mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually to handle the responsibility (fill in your own blank here), the workload and the rewards that will come with it, whilst adjusting our whole life to the new equilibrium.

Personal issues are purely reminders and benchmarks as to how things are being handled...and a lesson in growing.

It's not what happens to you it's what you do with what happens to you. While there is still time and health amazing things can happen in in a short space of time.

Jim Rohn puts it this way: 

"You don't have to change that much for it to make a great deal of difference. A few simple disciplines can have a major impact on how your life works out in the next ninety days, let alone in the next twelve  months or the next three years."

Stand on the higher ground you’ve reached and survey the world from that perspective. From there you’ll discover there’s no shortage in time to get things done, merely where we place our priorities with what time we have.

Try taking a break. Find a place of solitude, arrange with your spouse/partner to have the time out each day, (half to three quarters of an hour) then honour them by doing the same for them.

Great people are ones who don't need to accept what is. It is time to recognise that inner greatness. Take lessons from others, but remain true to yourself.

Your experience and knowledge can make you a leader in your own right.

The great lesson of leadership however is that we must never lose sight of the knowledge others may have to offer. Particularly that the giving of that knowledge does not seek to control or gain for itself in it's own right.

Earl Nightingale summed it up beautifully when he said in speaking of 'new people',

"This person is opposed to all rigidly structured, closed institutions. Such institutions are saying, by the fact that they are rigidly structured and closed, "We have the answers...we need look no further...this is it." "The new, powerful person knows that at this early stage of our development, such thinking is infantile. We do not have all the answers...about anything. And just as the maturing person is in a stage of growth, of becoming - so is a vital institution. It uses what it has and what it knows as springboards into the future...and assiduously avoids becoming closed and rigidly structured. A good and viable institution, like a self-actualising person, is always in a state of growth..of becoming."

Earl Nightingale

(1922-1989)

I highly recommend reading the full statement and see just how you fit into that picture. It could become a great affirmation.

Become aware that others are showing their best side to you and you are measuring who you know you are inside against that.

Not really comparing apples with apples is it?

In closing always remember that the price we pay for personal growth is that there is no going back.

Attitudes and Concentration Camps

Where there is no vision the people perish. Vision is what's missing in the world today.

Let me tell you a story of vision and faith.

We fill our lives with things that keep us busy. Giving us a sense of importance or purpose and value to our lives. One of the greatest times this was brought home was at a course in public speaking. We had just two minutes to say what we had to say, then finish with “the point I am making”.

A man in his sixties who had amazed us with his line of work and the intricacies of it came in and told a story that showed a totally different side of his life. We could tell that he wasn’t entirely comfortable with the topic he was about to deliver, but he started to share a very personal part of himself with us.

It was the end of a long day and fourteen year old Louis was sitting on the step at the front of the dormitory with his father. The day had been a long one and there was little hope of relief. Each sat with his own thoughts, soaking up the last feeble warmth from the sun as it was setting over the mountains. Many things can go through a person’s mind at a time like this. Happy things, sad things and just things that wander through the mind when it’s not actively engaged on a particular task.

His father broke the stillness and pointing to the setting sun said “see the beauty of what God has given us. A sunset and mountains that we see are beautiful”. Placing his hand on his sons shoulder he added “Remember this. God has given you this evening, this sunset and no matter what they take away from you this can never be”

This may seem of little significance until we are told the year was in the mid nineteen forties and the place was a camp in Poland, call Auschwitz. The point Louis was making was in a matter of moments, with a few significant words, his father had shown him the quality of taking the time to share something special with someone that would have a lasting purpose in their lives.

This would also have a profound impact on others somewhere in the future.

It left me wondering if at the end of the twentieth century we hadn’t somehow managed to make ourselves so busy with the urgent things, that we miss out on some of the very important things. Like seeing the sunsets. Feeling the air as the seasons change. Being aware that the night sky is really like the dome inside a cathedral.

The other thing that Louis didn’t say, and I’m sure that everyone in the room that night was aware of, is that 'everyone has a story to tell' and through what they have experienced have in their own unique way earned the right to tell their story. From this comes an understanding of really taking the time to not only listen, but hear what people are saying.

In my line of work it is a very special point in knowing the people I do business with when they start to share the things that are important to them. So when someone offers a cup of tea or coffee I find it quite easy to say yes. Work can always be caught up on later, but times as unique as hearing Louis’ story don’t come very often and who knows when the next one will. It’s like the changes that are going on around us that aren’t acknowledged until something stops us. Like the sunsets that are there every day yet we rarely “see” them.

From 'There’s Never Enough Time' Attitudes and Concentration Camps.

© Kim Stedman 1996

Autumn Evening

The shadows grow long across the land

and the air’s become cool and damp.

The sun's lost it’s merciless heat

and there’s movement around the camp.

Leaves hanging from a limbs on the trees

make patterns across the bright setting sun.

Frogs now give voice to the cooling air

and the peace of the evenings begun.

The colours now fade from blue into pink

then into grey as darkness begins to fall.

There’s an afterglow low in the Southern sky.

In the trees the last of the birds gives a call.

There’s stillness and peace and time to reflect

on matters that are a part of each day,

like sitting in the open under the stars

quietly conversing the hours away.

And so in this evening that Autumn has brought

there’s relief in days growing shorter and cool

and the fragrance of damp on the dry dusty earth

and stars blazing in that high deep indigo pool.

© Kim Stedman

You Already Have the Power

“When was the last time that you really thought about something important? The last time that you pondered a situation from every angle and examined every last minute detail. Many times, people don’t put forth that type of thought effort unless they have to. 

People don’t think about their health, until they get that life-altering call from the doctor. People don’t think about their relationships, until they are about to lose them. People don’t think about their career future, until they no longer have a steady career. 

They live in the problem and not in the solution. You already have the ability to reach that deeper level of thought in everything you do, to look at situations from every angle possible and to arrive at creative solutions that have a positive, lasting effect on your life.”

Start Your Day Right.

What's the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning?

Reach for the smartphone? I can't imagine any other device in history changing how we function, spend time, and relate to ourselves and others more than the smartphone.   

The word alarm is so appropriate, because it alarms us from the world of dreams and the unconscious, it always takes a few minutes to get fully back into our bodies. Some traditions teach that the soul travels between worlds when we sleep, and that the first words to break the silence each each morning should be... 

"Thank you for restoring my soul to me." 

This speaks to the fact that morning is a time when that gentle space between conscious and unconscious is thin and our minds are taking over.

Technology is 'in your face, demanding your thoughts and emotions meaning that the wonderful world of sleep and dreams is left far behind and forgotten. Then in that zombie like state we stagger into the routine that begins each day.

The harmony which we could have started the day with and continued to feel is left behind with the bed and that wonderful world we visited overnight. 

The way you begin your morning sets the tone for the rest of the day. this is not a war so we don't need to be on high alert and experiencing adrenaline which will keep us pumped for a while the let us down later in the day. We're on the alert for anything and everything. 

It's as if you had a young child who wanted to snuggle and share her dreams in the morning but you were constantly pushing her aside so that you could read your phone. Would the child feel loved and appreciated or rejected and cast aside? That's what we do on the inner level: When we fail to give ourselves attention by spending a few quiet minutes attending to our inner world upon awakening, we send ourselves the message that everything else and everyone else is more important.

As an experiment try turning off the alarm. You'll be amazed how you can actually wake at a chosen time, or close too it, without mechanical intervention. This allows your mind to gradually 'feel' it's way into a state of full wakefulness. Creating a gentle gap between the softness of sleep and the act of becoming a human 'doing.'

1. Practice mindfulness.

Even five minutes of mindfulness practice can set a calmer tone for your day. Mindfulness helps you come into the present moment and ground yourself to the here and now (here I am in space; right now in time). Cultivating that pause each morning will help you anchor back into it if the busyness reaches a crescendo as your day progresses.

2. Write down your dreams.

Dream-tending is an art and science that may sometimes require the guidance. In the old cultures dreams were interpreted by the Shaman with the purpose of understanding and healing. Writing down last night's dreams can help you preserve the valuable space of morning and fill yourself with spiritual energy. Allowing you in the future to relive those 'magic' moments. Even if you don't understand what your dreams are trying to communicate, remembering even one dream and thinking about it throughout the day helps maintain a a connection to yourself and will serve you well.

3. Journal.

Journaling is one of the most effective ways to know yourself and fill your inner well with self-love and self-knowledge. Effective jounaling ins liberating as it frees up the mind and allows greater reflection on our lives. ly. You should feel clearer and more grounded when you're done. It's a great way to start the day. Even just writing down a few simple sentences of what you appreciate can set a positive tone.

4. Practice simple yoga exercises.

Yoga is a mind/body practice that is done in a quiet place with time and space for reflection and reconnecting with your body. Preparing it too for the coming day of action.

5. Go outdoors and let the light and air fill your senses.

There's nothing like fresh air and sunshine to reconnect to you to your essential nature, which is good, loving, and worthy exactly as you are.

Into the open vessel of our morning-selves we can pour technology or we can choose actions that will fill the inner well with positive energy. Which do you choose?

Source: MindBodyGreen.